I have been married to the same man for many years, and now in our eighties we are struggling with keeping our relationship as strong as it once was.  When one ages, parts of the machine start to deteriorate. None of us are beyond this, so life can become extremely difficult to manage some of the time.  Heaven knows, we both really try, but there are days when neither one of us is capable of keeping the boat afloat. Today has been one of them when nothing seems to work. Both of us need sustenance, and neither is capable of providing it to the other.

Of course, there have been many days and years when life meant laughter and affection. However, nothing is perfect, so thus we are faced with a difficult dilemma-- what do two old people do when pain is their constant companion, even though they still love one another?

Every day has become a different doctor's day, and life is hardly the way it once was.

In the past, there were jobs we loved and family close by. Now we are alone looking to one another for the answer to survival, and neither of us has the strength or forbearance to handle problems alone.

I have tried prayer, and sometimes it helps. But in the final analysis, one feels helpless and weak, looking in the other room of a one bedroom apartment for the answer we need to find.

I know that these words are being read by others in their later years, and find myself wondering what solutions they have found to similar problems.

Arguing never serves a useful purpose, and making a real effort to provide the behaviors our mate wants are lost in the morass of argument and anger if we permit it to do so.

A while ago I wrote a book called "Trip of The Heart" that was published by Amazon. It dealt with a trip we took soon after we met and purchased a trailer and truck, and with our two dogs, A Golden Retriever and an Alaskan Malamute, set out on a journey that took us across the country. That trip provided more love and affection then either of us were able to find with another person.

Naturally, we had both loved and been loved, but he had lost a wonderful wife to Cancer, and I had chosen to leave a difficult marriage in a divorce that was long in coming. I wanted to find someone with whom I could enjoy my days and nights, and found that person in him.

As those who have come to know me are aware, we live in Las Vegas where we have both taught at the college level. In addition, he has written thirteen books, and I have done my share as well.

Hopefully the trip to the store has helped to clear his eyes a bit, and he is feeling better when returning home for dinner.